Written by Rae Chavous
I know what you’re thinking.
This cannot be an article about best places to use the bathroom in complete peace without anyone judging you for holding in the ball of gas churning in your stomach after having 3 consecutive classes back to back whose building’s bathrooms are all long lines filled with people-who-don’t-necessarrily-have-to-use-the-bathroom-just-as-bad-as-you-do-after-clenching-your-legs-tightly-in-the-crowded-lecture-hall-trying-to-cough-over-the-sound-of-your-bowels-banging-at-the-backdoor-as-if-it-were-the-entrance-to-the-gates-of-hell… at CSUF.
These are the best bathrooms on the CSUF campus to just let it go like Elsa said.
1. Mihaylo Building — anything above the 3rd floor
Everyone should know that the first and second floors of the Mihaylo building get crowded on a daily basis. Those two floors are the easy access ones, because those who think they are smart say one flight of stairs isn’t too far to go when you want to potty in peace, but two flights of stairs? Forget about it. Go to the third floor and up; you won’t have to wait. Also, your calves will thank you.
2. College Park — anything above the 1st floor
It’s all just a bunch of offices up there and honestly, if they are crowded that means either there is not enough work to do in the building or the coffee kicked in wayyy too fast for all of the staff and they had to make a swift exit. The mirror stretches all the way across the sink too. If you need further reasoning please refer to #1.
3. Pollak Library South — basement floor
We were all terrified of telling you about the wondrous bathrooms they have down here next to PLS-51 in fear of them getting crowded, but alas…here we are. The basement bathrooms next to TitanTV and Titan Radio stations are great! A row of stalls on both sides and three automatic soaps and hand dryers. There’s also FOUR mirrors in the girl’s restroom. Okay now everyone, slow down when you’re coming down the stairs to get here and don’t look at us weird if there is a full-on wardrobe change along with hair and makeup going on down here. NO ONE comes down here but us!
4. College Park — basement floor
It’s a basement. Same reasoning as #3 and same set up as #2. Real nice. Real quiet. Real-eef. Relief, get it?
5. Titan Student Union — the bathroom that is in the TSU next to the pavillions & auditoriums on the left
The only reason no one goes into this bathroom is that they probably think it’s one of those unisex one-stall restrooms. It’s not. Once you have the courage to push open the first door you’ll see that there are two doors, one labeled for men and one for women. Take your pick because these bathrooms have mirrors that go across the sinks and are very clean.
It’s clean, it’s quiet, and wow the mirror is nice. Take a peek inside. It’s like Narnia, but more bathroom.
Alright now, if you see a TR staff member on your way to use the bathroom down here, the least you could do is offer a hello. That is…unless you’re hurtling towards the bathroom like a rocket because you just couldn’t stand to wait in the line upstairs at the Pollak Library.
Did you even think of checking the basement floors? Go figure.
Health Center — Gender-neutral single stall that goes all the way to the floor so you cannot be seen.